Last night I had a dream that gave me a resounding feeling that it was not to be forgotten, but to be remembered and analyzed. My hope is that as I write it out, clarity with come forth.
I actually had a lot of dreams and what I remember, I'm not sure if it's all one big dream or a few that when I combine make sense? The first dream, or the start of my dream, I was married to a white guy, who reminded me a lot of musician, Kris Allen. Our marriage had been rocky and I got the impression, we were contemplating divorce. My husband and I went out to dinner with a man who claimed to be a Christian, but then he tried to kill me. My husband instinctively hurried to save my life, and he did. That action on his part broke through our issues and restored our marriage.
(This next part I'm not sure if it's a continuum of the dream (which makes sense for it to be), or if it's a new dream.) Basically the world was ending and there was chaos everywhere. For some reason, NO ONE believed it to be the second-coming of Christ. In this time of turmoil, people drew into themselves, denying God. It was every man for himself, selfishly doing whatever it took to survive. My family tried to leave town, but the roads were blocked off. No one took time to pray or call upon the Lord's name. We were like animals, without conscience.
God was beyond grieved at everyone operating out of the flesh and conducting our lives as if He didn't exist anymore. Jesus was not going to rapture his people unless they asked for forgiveness before the world ended. I had the distinct feeling He included all people, even children!
One day I was sitting on a park bench with my mother and my beautiful, baby daughter. She was the most beautiful baby I've ever, ever seen in my whole life. She was white! She had such fair skin with flushed cheeks, and the most delicate, feminine features: big, blue eyes with lonnnnnng eyelashes, the sweetest shaped mouth. She was probably between one and two years old, she still seemed 'babyish' and not totally in the toddler stage yet. She was so healthy looking and very chubby. She had the blondest, wispy hair. She seemed very intelligent and bright for her age; she talked quite a bit.
My mom, my daughter, and myself sat on the park bench, knowing the end was near; yet feeling comfort we were in it together. The world wasn't ending suddenly all at once, it was simply halting as it went, kind of like a storm hitting a specific area at once, then moving onward. Off in the distance, we could see life dissipating. We saw dark, demonic forces collecting all the souls who hadn't repented, who hadn't asked God for forgiveness in the last breath of their life. Conditions had been so bad, that many people had long forgotten God and His goodness!
Then my mother begin talking about reincarnation (which I don't believe in as a Christian). She said maybe we'd get a second chance and get to come back as birds. Two little birds were near us on a tree branch, and she thought it could be us. But could it?
Then a man approached us; it appeared he used to be an evangelist before the world began crumbling. It was now so clear to me that the fate of the world was being dangled before our very eyes: the fate of humanity was up to my baby daughter! I got the impression that she remembered life before this all began. She remembered the Holy Spirit, prayers, worship--was still a part of her. The man asked my baby if she wanted to accept Christ in her heart, if she wanted to repent for all the sins. She wanted to, she smiled at the thought of doing it! She spoke it, even with her limited vocabulary.
When the man went to write her name in a physical Book of Life, he hesitated! Even though he appeared to be one of the few who still believed, his own faith was questioning the authenticity of a baby giving her life to God when she couldn't possibly fully understand all it entailed. He again asked her, questioning her if she truly meant it, and she replied with such a sassy remark! It was a few-word remark that was so sassy and the man knew she meant what she meant! My mom and I laughed at how silly and sassy, my baby was.
(This next part, I'm not sure if it's the ending to my dream or a separate dream, but I like I said above, it makes sense as a link in this dream.) Time had passed and the earth was thriving again. My daughter having accepting Christ into her little heart moved the heart of God! God had searched and found the willingness of a child, and it impacted everything. God decided to give us all more time to come to Him, sooo mercifully, instead of eternally condemning us like we deserved. There would be more time, so everyone could come back to God.
With my daughter and family, we were at a get-together. I was soon to be leaving and walked outside while holding onto this precious girl. It was evening and there were people outside as well. They were looking at my daughter and I, just studying us. What did they see? Did they know it was her that God used that day? Still holding her, I looked down and just marveled at how beautiful she was. For some reason my husband (that Kris Allen look-alike from the beginning?) wasn't with me, and I wondered if the people were judging me because of that fact.
I remember thinking how full my heart felt with joy, and how far removed I was from my past with Marc! I looked down into my arms at my daughter, knowing so clearly she was not Marc's daughter. I thought: life not only goes on, but it's better than you can ever imagine! I felt so distant from Marc and my past, and so content and blessed with my present and my daughter! It was such an overwhelmingly good feeling.
